12 frogs

I do not want to hear that the plane I have been waiting to board was struck by lightning on its approach to the airport. Even if it is true.

Telling me that the engine was hit, but that there appears to only be surface damage is also unhelpful. Finally boarding the plane, only to be told that you all are still trying to determine if the plane is indeed airworthy does NOT make me feel better. I never want an airline employee — especially a pilot — to say the word airworthy to me. I don’t want to think about it, I shouldn’t have to think about it, and I want to go on believing that you won’t even step foot on a plane unless you know it’s airworthiness has been determined beyond all shadow of doubt.

I can put up with the absurdity of placing my laptop in it’s own plastic bin for x-ray, with ridiculousness of taking my shoes off, and even the ludicrous quart-sized plastic baggy of toiletries to be screen separately — just don’t make me think, even for a second, the actual mechanical safety of the plane is in doubt. I cannot bear to know it.

Also, once we are all back off the plane again, please don’t announce that you are closing down the counter and walking away in five minutes so you can go help different people (presumably, ones with a fully-functional aircraft) get to wherever it is they are going. That is just rude.